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Unexpected Experts, Coaching lessons I learned from Middle School Students

I am always learning new things, and feel it’s a gift to stay “teachable”. Here’s what I learned from the students I tutored last semester;

1) Submit & forget - When creating any “content” work for my coaching, I sometimes procrastinate, and want to keep editing my work until I think that it’s perfect. This “delayed thinking” is deadly for me, because I will never be perfect , and to hold on to my work is counterproductive.

I didn’t realize I was doing this, until I saw one of my students doing it while working together. After finishing her essay one day, she delayed turning it in. Her work was fine and done well, so after I inquired we discussed it. She said that she had been criticized before from the same teacher, and was afraid of “not being good enough”. After validating her fears ( as they had merit), I expressed the importance of turning in her completed work, no matter what anyone thought. In this way, she could focus on her other assignments, and have this paper out of the way. After seeing this so clearly, I now simply put my focus on the writing, not overthinking or worrying about what it’s sounds like. The important thing is to get it out.

2) “Listen & Learn”- Eye contact and “active listening” are one of the most important aspects of coaching. With my students, I noticed the ones that listened & asked questions didn’t get confused or do their or schoolwork incorrectly. If I can keep my focus with each of my clients, and stay present with them by engaging in “active listening” this helps me do my job so much better.

3) Do the hard things FIRST.- when you get that first assignment, and you have the energy and the information still fresh in your mind, it's important to do it first, even if it just means creating a plan of action. It may be finishing that essay, doing the tough algebra problems first, or starting your research for the history paper. As a coach, I make sure the hard things are done first, then they're out of the way and my mind is able to clear up and move forward with the rest of the work & keep the focus on my client.

4) Don’t over-think things -If students listened to the assignment the teacher gave and did only what's asked of them, it would keep things simple & allow them to complete the work and submit it. Likewise, so many times I've made things harder or more difficult in my life because I have over thought them. Now, instead of overthinking on a subject, I've learned to contemplate the problem, make a call, and get some perspective on the situation. If I stay in my head, my mind can make things bigger than they really are, yet if I’m “coachable” and open I always gain new insight.

5) Practice helps our progress - For the “End-of-Year” Final, students in Spanish class had to break up into groups, write a script, and act it out. Of the five groups that performed their Final, two got A+ grades. Those with the high grades had “practiced” their performance at least twice, and it took 15 minutes of extra time. When working with clients, I remind myself to start early and go over their paperwork, getting informed on what needs they have & what was discussed during our last session. This extra 15 min of “prep-practice” work truly helps me in giving the best service I can in order to help them achieve their goals.

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